Korean Scientist comes up with new way to produce gas: Korean people

Hwang Woo-suk has to be Korea's most popular scientist. First he came up with a way of cloning dogs. He promised every Korean family would have "Two dogs in every pot, and a car in the garage." While he hasn't yet come up with a way to guarantee a car for every Korean (or a garage, for that matter), he did deliver on his dog pledge. Koreans everywhere are licking their lips in anticipation of upcoming dog feeding frenzies.
Then he came up with another great idea. Let's clone Koreans. In one of the world's much overcrowded countries this is a great idea. Since most Koreans currently use just one of three surnames, Hwang Woo-suk decided to clone three more. So move over Mr. and Mrs. Park, Lee or Kim, here comes Mr. and Mrs. Kark, Pee and Lim. These are truly exciting times for the people of the Korean peninsula.
But the best is yet to come. In an announcement from Seoul today, Hwang Woo-suk has revealed that he has come up with a new fuel source: Korean people. According to the scientist, "Koreans fart a lot, and I have come up with a way to collect that gas." Mr. Hwang then went on to say "Koreans are known for their love of eating silkworms, dogs and live squid, but their favorite food has to be kimchi, which is what give Koreans that extra edge when it comes to producing gases."
Already, news of the professor's breakthrough has spread throughout the peninsula. Kids have been signing up in record numbers to do what they do best: create the gas that Korea is going to need in the future to help support all of those Mr. and Mrs. Karks, Pees and Lims when they are putting cars in their garages and dogs on their fryers. These are great days indeed for the Korean nation. Only time will tell how this breakthrough will affect the world's economy, but this reporter will keep following this story to see if it comes out as planned.