Did World War Three start while I was on vacation?

Sometimes being on vacation is a drag. I mean, honestly, I think I might have missed the beginnings of World War Three! I am staying in a guesthouse, and we have a television, but mostly people are watching pirated dvds on it. You can see the adventures of Captain Jack Sparrow almost any day. Last night I watched "Matchpoint," Woody Allen's recent, and most excellent film. Of course you could figure out what was going on pretty early, particularly after seeing the main male lead reading "Crime and Punishment." At least I did anyway.

But back to the more pressing issue: have we had an Archduke Ferdinand moment? Are the powers lining up against one another in some subtle, slippy, sneaky, secretive way? I guess I could check online. I have heard that there have been protests in Kuwait, with the occasionally American flag going-- poof--up in flames. The most shocking part of the story is that it involved Kuwaitis going outside in the middle of the summer to do something by themselves. If Kuwaiti are willing to go outside in that heat and burn something, by themselves, then America is in a whole heap of trouble. Perhaps it was a rally of domestic servants, Filiponas and Sri Lankan ladies who are really doing all of the burning. That would make more sense, and the Kuwaitis could still take credit.

Lots of recent events make me wonder. The Israelis are not giving an inch (2.52 cm.) in Lebanon, and this is in spite of the fact that Lebanon has some of the hottest women in the entire world. I really think the Lebanese aren't Arabs, based on their incredibly hot nature. I mean just look at these three lovely ladies. I went to yahoo images and typed in the word "Ugly Lebanese women" and this is what they gave me. Imagine if I would have typed in something else.

Iraq seems to be on the verge of something big, and the Americans and the British have recently started bandying around the "c" world in public. By that, of course, I mean Civil War, and that is a bad thing. Right? Actually, America became stronger because of our civil war. So maybe all that killing will do a bit of good, though I am not rooting for the decline of Iraqi civilization just yet.

And don't forget the most important indicator: Chase Utley. He has now hit in 35 straight games. He is trying to break a record that has stood since 1941. 1941! That's the year we went to war against Japan and the Nazis. Could this year's hit streak be a precursor of things to come?

One has to wonder about such things I guess. So if you are out there, dear reader, and have any thoughts on the above, or are indeed even reading this: do let me know if the big event has occurred.

Cheers and big ears.